Shinobi of Starfleet
by ColtKit
Summary: Shinobi have joined the stars, as a result of murdering Federation Scientist and stealing their technology. The Federation feels responsibility for the planet being exposed to a universe they aren't ready for and choose to guide them into a new age. WARNING: Spanking, Yaoi & Straight pairings
1. Chapter 1

**Title:**

Shinobi of Starfleet

 **Summary:**

Shinobi have joined the stars, as a result of murdering Federation Scientist and stealing their technology. The Federation feels responsibility for the planet being exposed to a universe they aren't ready for and choose to guide them into a new age

###

Picard groaned as he buried his head into his palms. He was sitting at his desk in his ready room, not quite comprehending what was being asked of him, "Child Soldiers," He breathed before exclaiming, "CHILD SOLDIERS!? You want me to welcome, with open arms, a man that gleefully uses children to fight and DIE in his name!"

The Admiral shrugged helplessly over the comm link, "It's not just him. On the world of Elemental Prime, all soldiers are expected to go through an apprenticeship at a very young age. It's heavily rooted in the planet's culture. Unfortunately the prime directive forbids us from trying to impose our values on anyone, even the ones we consider a matter of common decency. I expect you to hold true to that,"

Picard sighed, "Of course, Sir," emerging from his hands as he spoke. He grew even more worried when he saw the Admiral's expression.

"I'm afraid this is going to be harder to swallow then you think, Jean Luc." The Admiral groaned, rubbing his own temple, "These people manage to not only discover the team of Anthropologist studying them but they also stole their ship and tortured them until they taught them how to use it. After they got what they wanted they killed all the scientists as enemy spies. Then, after a few demonstrations of the vessels power, preceded to threaten the rest of the planet until they agreed to form a global government representing each of the most powerful 'villages'. I suppose we should just be grateful they didn't straight up conquer the planet, but instead formed a type of United Nations which directly rules over the planet. In the end we were able to peacefully regain control of the ship, but under a few... conditions,"

"What sort of conditions?" Picard dared to ask, already not liking where this was going.

"Each village is to send a team of 'Shinobi' onto each of our Starships. They are to be integrated into the ships' crew as private contractors. They are to learn how to safely and responsibly sail the stars for the next 8 years, at which point they will return to their planet,"

"Why 8 years?" Picard asked at the obscure number.

"It's how long the Planet's leaders believe it will take them to have their own fleet of star ships up and running," The Admiral informed.

"You can't be serious!" Picard gaped, "You want to effectively train their first generation of Spacers!"

"It's what the Vulcans did for us," The Admiral sighed, "Maybe not to this extent but their guidance is what turned us from savages into a beacon of civilization. We are the ones who exposed this planet to technology they just aren't ready for. It's our responsibility to make sure they don't kill themselves with it. I realize this is a slippery slope but it will be your job, as well as every captain in our fleet, to teach them how to better themselves without directly contradicting their culture,"

Picard groaned.

"I don't envy you," The Admiral sighed, "I truly don't,"

"Don't tell me it gets worse," Picard leaned back and rubbed his temple.

"Each Shinobi team... will consist of one Sensei and three apprentices,"

... Picard didn't even know how to process that. He stayed quiet for several moments... until he exploded, "You want them to train their child soldiers on MY boat!"

"You will be respectful of their culture, Captain. And just think of it this way. As long as they are on your ship they aren't out there risking their lives for some faceless propaganda,"

###

"This is so COOL!" Naruto jumped around looking all over their quarters.

He left the huge living room and ran down the hallway in the upper left corner. There was a sharp turn to the right, leading down another hallway to all the bedrooms. Each had a walk in closet and a bathroom. They were all the same size though, with a window at the end of the hall looking out into space.

"I'm never leaving this place!" Naruto swore and quickly jumped in one of the back rooms, "Dibs!" he quickly opened up his trunk and dumped all his stuff on the floor.

"Naruto-Baka!" Sakura glared as she barged into the room while dragging her own trunk, "You can't just call dibs on the only room with a view." While technically there were two, none of the kids figured they could get the second one.

"Really?" Naruto blinked, "Cuz it looks like I just did," he jumped on his new fluffy bed and kicked off his sandals.

"Sensei!" She cried for her teacher as he unpacked in the adjacent room.

The tall / skinny man with the ski mask covering most of his face peeked out of his own view filled room, "I'm sorry, Sakura, but Naruto did invoke the sacred right of 'dibs'. There is nothing I can do. Although this does mean you get to be right across from Sasuke,"

"Damnit it, Baka," Another boy screamed from down the hall, "Trade rooms with her! I'm not going to have that fan girl watch me dress every morning. These rooms don't even have DOORS!"

Sakura got a hot look on her face, "You know what, my room is fine," and quickly left.

"Don't worry Sasuke," Their sensei called, "You can print out some curtains from their replicator thing in the living room,"

###

Kimimaro lay on the hospital bed as a Doctor Crusher waved a magic wand at him. At least, as far as he was concerned, it was magic. He didn't understand the technology but he knew it worked.

His bloodline trait had long since begun to poison him, but since the discovery of the ship, their world gained remarkable advancements in treating genetic disorders. They were now able to scan the whole body through modified Jutsus based on the tech and isolate the issues.

He wasn't cured by any means but he was being treated for his disorder. Sound Village doctors had reversed much, if not most, of the damage and allowed him to live without constant pain.

He could even go back into the field. Orochimaru once again could use him and brought him along on this mission to claim his next vessel...

Kimimaro might be functional but he still had a genetic disorder that would require daily treatments like this for the rest of his life. Orochimaru was a god, a broken vessel such as he to contain such a soul was beneath the diety... but at least the young Shinobi was back to being useful to him.

Kabuto looked around the medical equipment, taking notes, as the Doctor treated Kimimaro.

"You sure he's well enough to be of use?" Kabuto snidely asked the Doctor, with his usual condescending smile.

Crusher glared at the teen, "As long as he gets his treatments he can live a normal life. While in my personal opinion he should not be working in such an active field, he is fit enough for it,"

She didn't think either of these boys were actually old enough to be in a security position but they were both 16. By Federation law they were both legally old enough to decide for themselves what they wanted to do with their lives. At least they were more qualified than the other child in the room.

A boy, all of 12, was standing next to her. Suigetsu was looking at everything with a goofy grin and chatting nonstop, although no one was listening to him as he bounced on his heels.

"Please Suigetsu," Kimimaro rested his hand on the little boy's head, "I know it is exciting to be here but you must try to hold yourself with the dignity of a Shinobi," the older boy gently scolded.

The little boy blushed, "Sorry Senpai," to which Kimimaro responded by lightly patting the boy's head before putting his arm back on the table.

###

Gaara... didn't know what to think. The Chunin exam had only been a couple months ago and... he still didn't know what to think. The attack against the Leaf village had gone poorly...

Father's spy network had heard about the alien ship the village of Konoha had taken possession of... so when Orochimaru of the Sound village told him he needed his help to steal it so they could decipher the technology for themselves... he stupidly jumped at the chance... It had been a massacre, nothing went as planned.

Not even Gaara's own curse could help them. He got injured during a fight during the exam and his siblings got him out of there just before the main battle started... only he still ended up getting his ass kicked in a one on one fight against a Shinobi named Naruto...

Konoha might not have been able to reverse engineer the weapons yet but they knew how to use them... It didn't help that the whole battle had just been a distraction by the sound village to assassinate the Hokage of Konoha while they stole the ship for themselves... not even that plan worked though...

Most of the Shinobi from both the Sound and Sand village were easily overpowered by the "Stun" weapons. Then they were trapped in Konoha's dungeon for a month. Although the leaf village did return them after they conquered the world with their alien technology... maybe "Conquered" was too harsh. The Leaf Village still let all the other villages do pretty much whatever they wanted. They just had to obey a new doctrine of agreed upon laws. The doctrine was even written by, and voted on, by all the Kage and even the leaders of all the smaller villages.

The Kage were now looking after the smaller villages in their country, doing away with the lords who did nothing but promote fighting by making villages compete for funding. Although the Kages had more power, so did the smaller villages. Now, even the leader of the smallest village, was allowed to vote on the laws and set the budget under their Kage. They acted as a council to keep their Kage in check. They had even been allowed to directly involve themselves in the forging of the Shinobi Doctrine. The Kages would make decisions regarding global law from now on, though they still had to adhere to the Doctrine.

Konoha explained that since now they had confirmation of aliens, and even Interplanetary governments, they needed to present themselves as one united world if they were to not only protect themselves, but sell their services to the rest of the Galaxy.

Konoha even included the sound village in this, despite their leader being a defector or their own village... The villages needed to be united if they were to hold their own against the aliens.

When more Aliens arrived around the planet and demanded their ship back... the Kages saw an opportunity. They dared to extort the Federation of planets, teach the Shinobi or they would use the ship to contact their enemies and sell their services to them. The Dominion would be particularly interested in a group of Warriors with limited reality warping powers... it was a pure bluff.

The Hokage had learned, from the ship's computers, the last thing they wanted to do was contact any of the Federations enemies. The Federation was the best one to deal with, and the easiest to manipulate because of the "superior sense of morality". They wouldn't let an "ignorant" planet that stumbled on their technology endanger themselves with it. They especially wouldn't let people with the Shinobis abilities fall in the hands of the Dominion when full out war was just around the corner.

The Kage agreed to some restrictions. They returned the technology they had stolen but their scientists were working on replicating it with what they had learned from the ship... the Federation couldn't stop them from doing that but they could teach them how to use the devices responsibly, which is what they wanted.

Elemental Prime was now full of Ambassadors and scientists from the Federation. Then there were various Genin teams, like his own, that had been sent out into space one Starships.

This particular ship, because it was the flag ship, had multiple Shinobi teams from each village. Important individuals were to be trained here... but the only one that really interested Gaara was the Konoha Jinchuriki, Naruto... Gaara was hoping to talk to him again and now it seemed like he would get to do so frequently.

This assignment wasn't just about learning how to be spacers. It was about cooperation between villages. Seeing as the Genin on this ship were mostly heirs to powerful Shinobi clans, wealthy families, or even demon hosts like himself. It was literally the perfect setting to talk to a boy from a rival village with regularity... if only Gaara could figure out what to say.

"Gaara!" his other brother, the puppet master, smiled at him from across the living room.

Kankuro had gotten more accepting of Gaara's attempts at... being a better sibling. Things were better now that Gaara made a point of not threatening to kill him... he was surprisingly forgiving... saying things like he was glad Gaara was finally willing to listen to brotherly advice. Kankuro was also more knowledgeable about social interactions than Gaara... the scrawny demon host used to just kill everyone who slightly irritated him... Gaara was getting better at repressing that impulse.

"Stop staring off into space and let's go exploring," comments like that would have at least earned a maiming from Gaara before the boy met Naruto. Now-

"You go ahead," Gaara spoke with his usual monotone voice, "I'll catch up later,"

Kankuro frowned, then did something that proved he had become more comfortable with his little brother. He talked back, "Don't be like that. They have an entire deck the size of a village dedicated to goofing off,"

"It's called the 'recreation deck'," A tall blonde girl walked out of the wall. Temari, their sister. She walked in with their Sensei, Baki. The girl rolled her eyes and scolded Kankuro in that bossy way of hers that always annoyed Gaara, although he was getting better at tolerating it, "And don't you think you should be doing something more important with your first moments on a space ship,"

"We are going to be put to work tomorrow," Kankuro scuffed, "Learning in toddler-like classes on how to use this alien crap. I would like to enjoy my last day as a free man before we get put back in grade school,"

"How can you treat this like a burden!" Temari gaped, "You seem to be glossing over the fact we are learning how to be SPACERS. We're in space, dumbass! Quit treating it like a chore!"

They bickered back and forth while Baki went over to the Replicator and materialized himself a cup of tea.

"Shut up," Gaara couldn't help but growl as his siblings continued to snap at each other. Both the older teens froze, clear panicked on their faces, "Sorry," Gaara looked away in shame.

Temari sighed, "No... that's our bad. Siblings are allowed to get on each other's nerves,"

"Yeah you know," Kankuro scratched the side of his face, "Just don't try to kill us," Temari whacked the teen upside the head.

"I won't," Gaara promised, "I'm not like that anymore," he said mostly to himself.

Baki got the kids attention, "Why don't you two explore the ship. I think Gaara needs to meditate for a bit,"

"Come on Sensei," Kankuro defended, "He didn't even snap at us,"

"No, he started lightly bickering with you two, like an actual sibling, and both of you freaked out," Baki recapped, "Which could encourage him to bottle up his emotions instead of acting on his every impulse. Both are horrible extremes which have horrible consequences for someone with his powers and mental state. He needs a healthy method of release, hence meditation. Now everyone, do as you are told."

"Yes Sensei," the children choired, including Gaara.

Gaara crossed his legs on the couch and started focusing on this breathing as his siblings left their quarters.

"Good boy," Baki praised, before taking a sip of his tea.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:**

The first part of this chapter was inspired by a review from "DarkShadowRaven" on the first chapter. If a review brings up an interesting idea or question I will be sure to try and adjust my story around it. I love audience participation.

Also I feel I should mention this isn't Yaoi. Gaara might have a crush on Naruto but Naruto doesn't return his feeling. Eventual ship will be Naruto / Hinata. I thought it might be cute, as well as a little sad, to have an unrequited love story as a subplot. Especially since Naruto and Gaara are going to become best friends in this story.

###

 **Chapter 2**

"I would like to formally apologize for the nasty business involving the scientists," The Hokage informed Picard as they enjoyed a casual cup of rice wine in the Kage's office.

The meeting with the other Kage and Village Leaders had ended near an hour ago, and the Shinobi should have finished boarding by now, but the Hokage wanted to talk with Picard on a more personal level before the fleet left.

Although this world was run by a council, with no real president or singular monarch, there was no doubt in the inhabitants' mind that this man ruled the world in all but title.

"They were researching not only how our Chakra works but also various Jutsus and clan bloodlines. These things are considered near sacred secrets to my people, and a capital offense. It is most unfortunate they were unaware of that...

"If I hadn't ordered their execution there would have been rioting in the streets and the other villages would have perceived me as too weak to protect my own village. Although the other villages would have still joined the council I formed, out of fear of the ship and the new threats of the greater galaxy... they would have lost too much respect for me as a leader to entertain the various amendments I suggested for our Doctrine... As regrettable as it was, your people's death ensured a new era of peace and prosperity on my planet,"

These people really were savages, "I shall make a note of it for the records," Picard swore.

"Please do,"

"It is good to know their deaths helped ensure your position of power," Picard couldn't resist making an offhand comment but it contained just enough respect to not be taken as an insult.

The Hokage sighed, "I never wanted that," he looked sincere, "I am an old man. I have been actively protecting this village since I was 8 years old..."

Picard paused as he understood the implications. This man, himself, had been one of the world's child soldiers.

"It would give me no greater pleasure then to retire and enjoy what remains of my golden years," The Hokage did not only sound sincere in that. He sounded tired, "Sadly there is no one else to take my throne. My old apprentices could, but they have all refused. No one wants this position and now it is no longer an option, even if I did succeed in changing their minds. This global government is far too new and leaving my position now, when so many turn to me for guidance... it would cause instability when we are trying to encourage cooperation. I don't have to tell you how dangerous a moment like is for peace. One wrong move and not only does it grind to a halt, but it very well could result in war. Maybe in a few more years I can finally enjoy my retirement but for now insuring the peace is too important,"

... Maybe there was more to this man then the leader of a savage world...

"Do you have toast on your planet?" Picard asked.

The Hokage smiled a near Grandfatherly smile, "Would you like to propose one?"

Picard raised his tiny bowl, "May the peace of your world bring about a lasting relationship between our own,"

The Kage raised his own palm-sized bowl, "And may we honor the brave men and women whose lives ensured it," clinking their bowls and downing the Sake.

###

Naruto awed as he looked out the window in one of the lounges on the Recreation Deck. There were a few other Genin with him, from various villages. They were all admiring the view of their world. The little massive green and blue ball under them.

There were dozens, maybe hundreds, of space ships all around the planet. Their business on the planet was over but all the Captains were supposed to meet on this boat in a few more hours for some kind of deporting ceremony.

Their Captain had just returned and summoned all the Jonin Senseis. Kakashi said the Captain had asked the Genin not be present, which was a little weird but it's not like the Hokage never asked to speak with the Jonin alone either. Usually it was something important and world ending, or just going over village secrets that were above the Genin's pay grade. Naruto couldn't fathom what was so important when they just got onboard a few hours ago. They hadn't even left orbit yet. If the Captain just wanted to meet the new crewmen and give a speech the Genin definitely should have been present. Those things were boring as hell but it was mandatory for a Shinobi of any rank.

Regardless the Captain encouraged the "children" to wander in his summons for the Jonin, which made Naruto think he was one of those irritating people that insisted on treating Genin like civilian children. Genin were legally adults regardless of age, it was part of the appeal of signing up for the academy. Yet here...

Naruto was legally allowed in any bar so long as he was wearing his headband, and the villagers were no longer allowed to refuse him service because of the demon in his belly. Yet the first place Naruto went to on this ship had kicked him out just because they served alcohol? He hadn't even ordered any! It tasted kinda weird.

He wasn't allowed in engineering or the Bridge, or basically anywhere but the Recreation Deck and his team's Quarters, so the Genin didn't have a lot of choices of where to go. They were being treated like children, not Shinobi, and it was clearly irritating many of them. They would have to talk to the Captain about this.

Still the Recreation Deck wasn't that bad. Although there was a red light district Naruto saw a Genin get dragged out by his ear while they were having their hide swatted. That lady was really lucky the Jonin told the "kids" to respect the authority of everyone on this ship, as this was a military base with the only civilians present being the crew's families... anyway that guy looked like he desperately wanted to slit her throat for the indignity. He was from freaking wave country, according to his headband. He would have done it to if not specifically ordered not to. That lady had no idea how close to death she just came for mistaking a Shinobi for an ordinary child.

He was ALLOWED in the red light district, at least on Elemental Prime, and Sakura said these aliens biggest laws were respecting other people's cultures! They sure as hell weren't doing that with the Genin!

"This place is rather peculiar,"

Naruto shrieked as Gaara seemed to just appear next to him. He hadn't notice him come over at all.

"Don't DO that," Naruto glared

"My Apologies," Gaara spoke in that emotionless monotone of his, "It's more a habit, Shinobi are supposed to move silently,"

Naruto was going to yell at the boy but wasn't sure if he was being a smart ass or genuinely thought Naruto didn't know that. Both seemed pretty insulting.

"These aliens don't appear to have a concept of 'teenagers'," Gaara went on with his original point, "Anyone under 16 is treated as if they were a small child, even 15 year olds like my brother. He isn't particularly happy about that,"

Naruto snorted, "No kidding, no wonder they have a hard time getting their heads around the idea of Genin,"

"My 17 year old Sister went into the red light district just to taunt him," Gaara informed. Although he seemed completely emotionless something told Naruto he was amused by their antics.

Naruto snorted again, this time due to the laughter he was holding back.

"Come on Gaara," Naruto placed his hand on the boy's shoulder, "Let's see what these aliens do for fun,"

Gaara just stared at the hand, trying to understand how this was possible. The hand was there, on his shoulder. He could feel it... it felt weird... Naruto was actually touching him. How was that even possible? He honestly couldn't fathom. The sand didn't let anyone touch him.

"Come on stop looking so creepy!" Naruto smiled as he removed his hand but retained his goofy smile.

He didn't stop there. He put his other arm around Gaara's shoulder. Then turned them both to face the door and casually walked out, near dragging Gaara with him as if he was an old friend... and it was indeed causal... Naruto-kun... didn't fear him at all.

"Why's your face getting red?" Naruto blinked as they walked down the hall.

"My face is getting hot," Gaara emotionless informed, "I think I might be running a fever," it was the only explanation he could think of for why he suddenly felt so weird.

"Well don't get me sick!" Naruto quickly unlocked his arm and scampered a good arm's length away... but he was still walking with him.

Gaara felt his heart speed up. He really must be sick, but why would it come on all of a sudden?

"I should report myself to sickbay," Gaara informed.

"Seriously!?" Naruto gaped, "You're going to go to the Hospital!? Voluntarily!?"

"Sudden onset illness is usually serious," Gaara informed.

"Well let me escort you," Naruto turned towards the elevator, "Geez I hope you don't have whatever Hinata does. That girl is always getting sick,"

Gaara's chest tightened more and suddenly he was feeling very jealous for whoever this Hinata girl was. Why he wasn't sure. Maybe he was getting delirious.

###

Kimimaro was still in the hospital wing, going through various test. His treatment only took a few minutes but he had been in here for hours as a result of all the extra test and scans the Doctors were doing. The Chief medical officer assured him this was a one-time thing and they were just trying to get a full map of his condition.

Hearing the door hiss open Kimimaro looked over to spot the two Jinchuriki step in. Kabuto wanted him to keep an eye on them. He wanted Kimimaro to analyze their seals and give him the information. He claimed that if he could analyze the seals he could develop his own. One that could make it so anyone with a curse mark could contain their Lord's soul indefinitely. He just had to tweak it so that Orochimaru would maintain full control, but then the serpent god would be able to live for decades, perhaps centuries, before he would need a new body. That would be particularly useful given their world's new plan to take their craft to the stars. Kimimaro didn't really care for the Medic but if he could do their lord such a service they were obligated to give it a try.

"What seems to be the problem," one of the nurses walked over to the boys.

"I feel very peculiar," The red head informed.

"Well hop up on the table and let me get a scan of you," said the nurse, pull out her "wand" or whatever it was.

The boy did as he was told.

"What are your symptoms?" The nurse asked as her device began to decipher its readings.

"My mouth feels kinda dry and my face is hot. My heartbeat is also abnormally fast," The Gaara informed.

The nurse nodded, as her device was still recording the data, "When did it start?"

"When Naruto touched me,"

The nurse paused, then her own face turned red as the readings came up on her device.

"Gaara isn't allergic to me is he!?" Naruto yelped

Kimimaro couldn't help it, he burst out laughing.

The nurse became flustered, "Errr, no, everything is fine. It's just a slight hormonal imbalance common during puberty,"

Gaara blinked, titling his head slightly, "Puberty? I am unfamiliar with the term,"

Naruto helpfully explained, "It's when white goo starts shooting from your-" at least he attempted to.

"OKAY!" The nurse's voice got panicky, "It's perfectly normal and there is nothing to worry about," she squeaked, while some of the other doctors and nurses started snickering too.

The 2 little boys just stared at her all confused.

Naruto asked, "but what does that got to do with Gaara getting sick all of a sudden?"

"It will be best if your guardians explain it to you," The Nurse insisted.

Naruto wasn't having any of that. He crossed his arms and glared at the nurse, "We don't have 'Guardians'. We're Shinobi!"

Kimimaro spoke up. It just came natural to him to go into lecturing 'Senpai' mode given how much time he spends with the younger children Orochimaru has rescued, "Don't get defensive. You know full well she means your Sensei. As Genin you should be used to civilians treating you like typical children. You need to be patience and tolerate them,"

Naruto pouted but said nothing

"I'll send a message to both your Senseis," The nurse tried again, "For now just go back to playing,"

Naruto opened his mouth, looking like he was about to start screaming obscenities at her, but let out a yelp as a bone dagger cut across his cheek and impaled the wall behind him.

"Respect your elders," Kimimaro warned, his finger still pointing at the child.

All the Medical officers began snapping at him and acting all hysterical, for a reason none of the Shinobi could understand. How did the Federation discipline their military forces?

Well the Medics yelled at Kimimaro Gaara guided Naruto out of Sickbay.

"That was weird?" Naruto commented as he rubbed his cheek. It wasn't even bleeding, just a little irritated. Most Shinobi wouldn't have been satisfied unless they drew blood or at the very least created a bruise. Kakashi was even prone to leaving bumps on top of his Genin's heads when they acted up. That Kimimaro guy even gave Naruto a warning through his light scolding first.

"Very," Gaara acknowledged, "Maybe these Aliens consider it taboo to use physical discipline?" He suggested. That never exactly worked on him, with his ultimate defense, but he wasn't exactly against it when Baki applied it to his siblings. Baki preferred to make Gaara run laps when the boy acted inappropriately. At least he had since Gaara started acknowledging his authority.

"That's not it," Naruto shook his head as he took his hand away from his face, "I saw a one of these Federation people spanking a Genin from Wave Country,"

Gaara... blinked, "That was rather... daring?" Gaara was trying to find the proper word for it that didn't cause insult.

"No shit," Naruto rolled his eyes, "Point is, if they are against hitting people why'd they do that?"

Gaara had no answer, so he just stared blankly.

Naruto rolled his eyes and moved on, "Well I guess that bone guy had a point that I should treat these guys like Civilians even though this is a military ship,"

Gaara again had nothing to add so he just stared.

"Come on," Naruto grabbed hold of Gaara's wrist and started running towards the turbo lift, "We still need to check out the Recreation deck well we can,"


	3. Chapter 3

Kakashi started at the Captain with disapproval as he and the other sensei sat as the audience well the Captain lectured them about the ship, apparently designated "The USS Enterprise NCC-1701-E". The Captain spoke with authority well holding himself with a surprising amount of formal dignity. The man acted like the lords Elemental Prime just stripped of power. So far, Kakashi was not impressed. He seemed like a political man, not someone that would know how to properly use Shinobi. Or even someone capable of military strategy... looking back it's strange how deceiving first impressions can be.

"Captain." Kakashi's eye turned to see it was none other Zabuza that got the man's attention. The former Mist Shinobi was proudly sporting his new Konoha headband, only a few months old. "As thrilling as all this is, could you get to the reason you requested our genin not be present."

The Captain stiffened. "I requested nothing of the sort. I merely suggested they might prefer wandering the ship as opposed to a stuffy boardroom briefing."

All the Jonin present stiffed in turn. One of them, from Wave Country, snarled. "You mean to tell me you didn't want our genin here because you rather they 'go play' like useless children? THEY ARE SHINOBI! Not undisciplined welps. They are SUPPOSED to be present for routine briefings!"

Picard clenched his fist, clearly wanting to voice his own displeasure. Thankfully he was saved by a voice coming over the intercom.

"Captain, Alpha Priority security matter."

The Captain immediately hit his badge. "Go ahead."

"One of the Sound genin attacked a Konoha genin."

The Sound Four immediately stood up in outrage.

"That's a lie!" insisted a six armed jonin. "No member of the Sound Village would dare attack a member of Konoha, not after everything they did for our lord!"

Kabuto, the traitor of Konoha and right hand of Orochimaru, smirked at that. Still seated he reminded, "It wasn't that long ago we were killing each other. If some of the younger Genin forgot themselves and got into a fist fight we will discipline them according. Who was involved?"

Picard relayed the question and the com informed, "A Kimimaro and Naruto Uzumaki."

Every last one of the Sound jonin paled... there was something to that. Or they were just worried Konoha's Jinchuriki was involved. Kakashi could discover the truth later. For now he played it off, "Naruto can be pretty irritating at the best of times. I'm sure it is just boys being boys. Still we should handle this formally."

Kabuto stood and walked towards the Captain, as did Kakashi.

"So." Kakashi smiled with his eye. "You took it on yourself to discipline my Genin for disrespect and the medical staff overreacted."

"Yes sir," Kimimaro answered formally from behind the force field. "I didn't even break skin but the staff took offense and had security escort me here."

Kakashi nodded, "It was good of you to allow that. It would have complicated things if you had killed or even injured any of them."

"I am aware, Kakashi Sama." The boy bowed.

"I was more saying that for the Captain's benefit." Kakashi smiled. "He seem to feel comfortable with the notion you aren't here willing. Would you care to demonstrate how he is wrong?"

The boy's body suddenly turned grey as large thick bones pierced through his back. He grew an almost dinosaur like tail with thin spiny bones sticking out the top. The boy raised his arm and bone shards shot out of his skin, aimed perfectly at key points around the force field. There was a small explosion and the room temporarily filled with smoke.

Picard was forced to cover his eyes but when he looked back the force field was down and boy was standing outside the cell, no longer grey but back to his pale skintone... could all these aliens do that?

The Copy Ninja looked back to the Captain. "He is only allowing you to keep him here because he legitimately did nothing wrong. As a more experienced Genin it is within his right to discipline the younger ones. Normally doing so to a Genin of a different village would be unacceptable but as this is a joint operation he acted appropriately."

"Appropriately!" The Chief medical officer howled. "He threw a jagged bone sharp at your charge! It impaled itself through a wall. The boy ran off before we could even make sure he was okay!"

Kabuto spoke up, "If he wanted to hurt the boy he wouldn't have been able to run away. However, if it's the damage to the ship that concerns you I assure you Kimimaro will be sufficiently punished for-"

"That's not what I want!" The Doctor yelled.

Kabuto gave a condescending smile, "Then what DO you want, because you seem to be shrieking for the joy of it."

The Doctor was about to say something when the Captain intervened, "Beverly," Addressing the Doctor with a bit too much familiarity then a military leader should... that actually earned him some Brownie points in the eyes of the Shinobi. Then he looked over at the two Jonin, "Well I understand the need to discipline your apprentices. Well you are on my ship you will find some other way to do so. My crew will not recognize violence against children as proportion punishment."

Kabuto raised a curious eyebrow. It wasn't like they abused their Genin. Kimimaro didn't even draw blood in this instant, and at worse they just got a little scratch or a knot on the head. More as a way to express displeasure then truly hurt the kids.

It was kinda obvious, given what Kakashi knows about his charge, that Kimimaro didn't actually want to hurt Naruto. Naruto would never run from a fight, even when he should. He delighted in those situations. Punishment on the other hand? The boy tended to quickly scram after being disciplined. So Kimimaro's claims matched pretty well with Naruto's behavioral patterns.

Kakashi tried to explain, "As you are effectively our client we are obligated to indulge your personal preferences."

Picard nearly sighed with relief but Kakashi wasn't done. "However, how do you purpose we punish our genin? Many, like Naruto himself, do not respond to extra laps or additional exercises. They do these things obsessive already. No, Naruto has never responded well to anything outside physical discipline. If you tie my hands in this he will likely lose all respect for me as he will come to the conclusion any and all behavior will go unpunished. That will be a very dangerous mindset for a genin to have well on a ship."

The doctor snapped, "How about you try disciplining him as a child instead of a living weapon?"

All three Shinobi stiffened. Even Kabuto seemed outraged by the thought.

Kimimaro spoke up. "Because they aren't ordinary children. Genin work hard and risk our lives to protect our villages! That alone earns us additional rights and privileges. I concede we aren't adults but we are much more then typical children."

Kakashi stared down the woman. "My genin are not living weapons. I tend them, teach them, and make sure they eat right. Just as my sensei did for me and his Sensei before him. Well they might not be full blown adults they are not simple children either. They are shinobi and should be respected for their sacrifice."

The Captain informed him, "Well we understand that other cultures have different stages of adulthood, ours does not. We did in the past and that was found to have severe psychological affects on them. At least, for our species. We are uncomfortable treating them otherwise due to these issues from our own history."

"No." Kabuto eyed the Captain. "You believe some magic number decides adulthood rather then the individual's personal maturity and level of responsibilities. Our genin have a good deal depending on them and that alone should be respected and rewarded with additional privileges. Like not being condescended to for being too 'young'. It is offensive to punish them like civilian children, when they deserve so much more respect."

Kabuto was trying to keep a level head. Reminding himself these aliens might look like shinobi but they were very much aliens. Their smaller eyes and mundane hair colors was proof they weren't the same race. Kabuto still needed to learn what they know.

"You might want to be careful with that around Wave country. They are in the habit of killing everyone who offends them," Kabuto gave a friendly warning.

The Captain's eyes harden. "I will not tolerate such actions against my crew, especially not for misunderstandings brought on by cultural differences." These people were as bad as Klingons... maybe that was how they should be treated. Picard was familiar enough with warrior based societies.

Kabuto rolled his eyes. "I am not from Wave Country. My village as, subtler ways of righting those that wrong us."

"Like making deaths look like accidents." Kakashi eyed the shinobi, to which Kabuto smiles.

"Konoha are much more merciful in their approach," Kabuto spoke as if it was a bad thing. Smiling at Kakashi condemning. "They will just inflict a few bruises, maybe a cracked bone or two."

The Captain snapped, "Both of which are unaccepttable!"

"These people are our clients," Kakashi reminded Kabuto. "It would be inconsiderate to damage them."

Kimimaro sighed, but not in Kabuto's condemning way. More like a 'why me' groan. "A large reason why the Sound village doesn't take clients. We tend to focus our resources towards the goals of god."

Picard stiffened well Kakashi sighed in exhaustion.

Kakashi explained, "Your god's current goal is to develop into a space fairing civilizations and colonize your own world. In order to do that you need to learn from these aliens in exchange for your services. That effectively makes them your clients and you should act in accordance with the doctrine your god signed."

It was all kinds of bizarre to reference to Orochimaru as a 'god' but it was evident he wasn't a mortal anymore. He turned himself into a demon. A being of pure Chakra guided by conciousness. Specifically, he was a leech demon. He couldn't survive for long outside of a host but the act of inhabiting a body slowly deteriorated that body until the host rotted away.

At first, given all his crimes, The 3rd Hokage wanted to seal Orochimaru, like any other rouge demon. However the sound village worshipped him, and Hokage-Sama had no idea where the village was or even how big it was.

Kabuto, being second in command, negotiated a deal through the other Kage. Orochimaru would only take willing host and would recieve a seat on their council, in exchange for sharing ALL the Sound Village's research into new jutsus and promising not to test on human subjects anymore unless they volunteer to get around a death sentence. The Hokage didn't like it but he was outvoted. So he couldn't very well act against Orochimaru without implying the Council's votes didn't really matter. In order to ensure peace Konoha had to forgive Orochimaru and all his agents of their crimes. It might very well be why so many of the Kage voted "yes" to the Sound Village's deal, a test to see how sincere Konoha was in their message of peaceful equality for all villages. They were willing to embrace a monster to test this and Kabuto was smart enough to exploit it.

"That doctrine states we must bend to the preferences of our clients so long as it does not in danger our Shinobi needlessly," Kakashi reminded before looking at the Captain. "I will speak with the other Konoha Shinobi and inform them of your ruling on how we should punish our genin. Many of them won't like it, and fact I imagine you will get more then your fair share of anger comments from both Senseis and apprentices, but they will respect your wishes."

Kabuto clenched his teeth then informed, "The Sound village is not stupid enough to go against the doctrine when the ink is still wet on our treaty."

Kimimaro looked at Kabuto in horror.

"However, don't expect us to help you persuade the other villages." Kabuto glared. "Though, I will give you some friendly advice. Have a healthy dose of your security team present when you inform the Shinobi from wave country. This order is a grave insult to our profession and they will likely need to be stunned after you inform them or they will likely kill you." 


	4. Chapter 4

The Shinobi's plan was relatively simple. Once they got their own ships the current Jonin would serve as senior officers and some would even be promoted to Captains. The Genin would be tested to see if they should be promoted to Chunin. A select few might even be able to advance to Jonin.

The Kage had requested Starfleet officers to come to their Shinobi Academies next year and begin teaching additional classes on space travel and maintenance. Then the best, and only the best, graduates would be chosen to leave the planet once the ships were ready.

A Federation advisor would remain onboard each of their ships. At least, until the Federation was convinced Elemental Prime wouldn't kill themselves with their stolen technology, or plunge the galaxy into another war.

Each ship would have members from each village, the same teams that trained together on each ship. Where as most ships only had one team from each village, the students training on Picard's ship were special. They would be the operators of their planet's own flagship. The heirs and proteges from each powerful clan were here, along with their teams. The were the future of political power on their planet.

Picard sighed as he sat back in his seat. He looked out into the black from his ready room, watching the stars whizz by.

It had been a month since the Shinobi came on board and he had gotten reports of them starting fights almost hourly. They might look humanoid but these Shinobi were undoubtedly a warrior race. They loved to fight and insult each other, yet somehow appeared to bound over the savagery... they reminded Picard a lot of Klingons in their behavior, but that was not the issue. The problem came through their many human like traits. They were kind and noble yet violent and cruel. Their mix of Federation and Klingon values is what made it so hard to deal with them. They were so human in their mannerisms that it was easy for the crew to forget their more violent tendencies, from time to time that is.

Shinobi always solved problems with their fist, particularly their females. Shinobi women were easily the most violent, even amongst the children. It was come to see the girls using the boys as punching bags for even slight grievances, yet the passing adult Shinobi just laughed and walked on. Still they didn't appear to have a female dominant society. It was rather enlightening to see they had a mindset of true equality for both genders. True they had their own set of gender norms but they viewed each other as equals... which directly meant they had no concept of "chivalry". The girls might start the fights, more often then not, but the boys had no issue swinging right back. True equality in action. Lovers, even among the adult Shinobi, frequently got in physical fights with each other and no one batted an eye. If anything Shinobi males appeared to only be attracted to women who were capable of taking them in a fight. It was near a courtship ritual for them.

Instead of "No violence against women" Shinobi had a policy of "avoid violence against civilians when possible", which thankfully meant few fights broke our between the Shinobi and the crew... although they often tried to goad the security officers.

That wasn't the worst of it though. Many of the crew weren't happy that Picard had allowed any child with a village headband to drink synthohol or even enter the red light district (all the dancers were holograms but some of the crew felt awkward seeing a child get a lap dance right next to them). Picard had to concede those privileges however. He didn't have a choice. It was a order from the Federation President herself.

Shinobi from far too many of the Starfleet ships contacted their relatives, as the ship's communications relay was still within range of Elemental Prime. The children called complaining to their parents, probably just to vent their frustrations and not realizing the true issues. Their relatives, in turn, contacted their government officials and it quickly went up the bureaucracy until the Kages called up the Federation President screaming about how Starfleet was oppressing their culture... an accusation like that does not go unnoticed in the Federation.

All the Captain's got a dressing down and an order to let the Shinobi behave according to their cultural norms. Thankfully, Picard was able to get a compromise with Elemental Prime about how they disciplined their Shinobi... that had been harder then expected and required him to go back to the planet to make his case in person. He was able to persuade them by pointing out what Kakashi did. That their doctrine, they wrote themselves, allowed clients to dictate terms so long as it didn't endanger the Shinobi's lives needlessly. That the Kage knew they would have to compromise in some areas well interacting with the rest of the Galaxy. That most races, not even other warrior races, would approve of how they disciplined children...

Picard was rather shocked how affective his words were as the Kage wrote up new protocols for disabling Genin under the age of 25 (apparently that was when their brains finished developing and when civilians were usually considered adults as a result). They had all the village leaders, even the ones from the smaller villages, vote on it. Picard had to make another speech at that meet as well. Thankfully it passed.

Their mind illusions, as well as physical blows, were no longer allowed. It was recommended that extra training be used for most forms of discipline but on children that didn't work for they were to write lines, be grounded, or even spanked. All three of which were hard sells but it actually wasn't Picard that recommended them.

To Picard's surprise many of the smaller villages actually agreed with Starfleet that Shinobi's traditional methods of discipline was too harsh for children. So their planet wasn't made up of strictly Warriors. They were just the ruling class... which might be more benevolent then Picard first realized as the child soldiers tended to be trusted in positions of political power when they were older, like the Kage and most of the village leaders and their councils. Not everyone was a Warrior but Warriors were greatly respected and trusted on their planet.

This was further demonstrated by all villages refusal to "deny" the genin their "rightful privileges" regardless of age. They were all adamant that although many of the Genin where young they should be allowed certain privileges usually restricted until adulthood for most cultures. A reward for their service to their village. In fact the Kage arranged for more Shinobi academies open up in even the smaller villages, sending Chunin instructors and guards out to each one. That way even more Shinobi could be trained to serve as the planetary military. As their planet was still too hostile with bandits and rogue factions to not have a planet side military. True, Konoha had destroyed all known bandit strongholds when they had the starship, but they didn't know were most of them were. So many bandits survived the purge and were more violent then ever.

This was much how things were done on Ancient Earth. Where child soldiers were "reward" with alcohol, drugs, and women to turn the moments between the savage killings into one endless party. All the while promising advancement and power through the army... only different was the leaders of these armies actually intended to give their child soldiers such advancements.

"Come in," Picard called, hearing the door chime.

Worf walked in with his usual grave expression... only the face seemed even more serious then usual.

"Yes, Commander?" Picard eyed as Worf silently handed him a datapad, not having the words to describe it. Picard slowly realized why. "This isn't possible. Have you checked for any tampering to the program."

"None was found," Worf assured. "I checked and triple checked after they left. The Shinobi team acted accordingly."

Picard's mouth became dry as he read over the report, then watched the attached footage of the program. It was brilliant beyond brilliant, yet filled with a savage cruelty humanity long since lost the ability to think as. "They beat the... how is this possible..."

"Their victory is solely the responsibility of one child, the tactical officer during the simulation."

"I would like to meet this boy." Picard couldn't look away from the pad. At the sheer insanity of the tactics used, "What's his name?"

● One hour Earlier

"BELIEVE IT!" Naruto howlered as he completely yet another tactical stimulate in the Holodeck. His unorthodox brain allowing him to think up some truly bizarre solutions to the problems.

The Klingon operator started at him in disbelief as the Holodeck died down. The boy's sqaud left their post, the positions they were training for when their 8 year mission was up.

Sakura as councilor, science officer, and medical officer. Sasuke as pilot, communications officer, and engineer. Kakashi as Captain... and Naruto as tactical officer and security officer. This boy wasn't exactly a "critical thinker", or at least that is what his teachers assumed. He was the bottom of the class for the various sciences and only appeared to excel at military strategy and combat... if this didn't prove he was an idiot savant Worf didn't know what would.

"You just passed the Kobayashi Maru." Worf stared at the little blonde child. Who's plan was the sole reason this team won.

Naruto grinned like a loon, not at all acting with the grace or dignity of such a brilliant Warrior. "Hell yeah we did! That was really hard but I managed to save all crew without provoking a war."

Sasuke rolled his eyes as he wondered over, "That is only because you killed all the enemies before they could send for backup." He smirked. "Not bad, Dupe. Our squid is the first to pass. Shikamaru is getting closer but he still can't block the enemy transmissions, defeat all the ship, and save the civilians all at once. And this was our first try! He's going to be so jealous,"

"Oh yeah." Naruto fist bumped the air. "With Naruto Uzumaki as tactical officer we'll be the most badass ship in the galaxy. BELIEVE IT!"

Sakura shook her head. "You said that."

Kakashi's one exposed eye studied Worf a moment, as if sensing something was wrong. Then smiled at his team. "Why don't we celebrate. Head on over to Ten Forward. I'll meet you there."

"WOO, Booze on Kakashi," Naruto screamed and ran out of the Holodeck with the others tailing him.

The adults that were left behind could hear Sakura yell, "Everything is free here, baka. Kakashi isn't actually buying anything!" Before the doors closed.

Kakashi looked over at the Klingon. "Is there a problem?"

Worf straightened. "The purpose of the Kobayashi Maru is to have cadets experience fear. To stand before a no win scenario and learn to face it with honor and dignity."

"No win?" Kakashi didn't miss that remark.

"They are supposed to fail. While, it is admirable that Mister Nara continues to retake the test it is only supposed to be a one time thing... only one man in the test's hundred year history has ever passed it, and he did it so by dishonorably reprogramming the test... he cheated... your disciple just came up with a strategy that defeated an unbeatable situation."

Kakashi smiled, even prouder. Yet he waved it off with, "He does that," and began to walk away.

"I would request some one on one time with the boy." It sounded more like a demand then a request.

"Any practical reason?" Kakashi looked back, as if he didn't know.

"He is brilliant but he won by the skin of his teeth. I would like to help hone his tactical skills... he will grow into a fine Warrior some day. I want to help shape him into the best."

Kakashi shook his head. "You're far from the only one who wants to poach my student. I'll be sure to pencil you in." And walked out of the Holodeck.  



	5. Chapter 5

Naruto scowled as he stumbled in his robes. They were heavy and he kept tripping in the elevated sandals. The single wooden strip in the middle made it hard to balance.

Kakashi sighed, he knew he should have given Naruto lessons on formal edict. He figured the Hokage, at least, would have. What with how often Naruto ate with the man. Kakashi should have recognized those dinners wouldn't have been formal, regardless of the Sarutobi's station. Naruto was basically the man's adopted grandchild.

The boy had no grace in the formal attire and it was obvious the Jonin from the other villages were judging him. Not the boy, it was Kakashi they were shaking their heads at. Naruto's lack of demeanor was his teacher's failing.

"Hold my arm, Naruto," Kakashi adviced as they walked down the hall in their formal attire.

"I'M NOT A LITTLE KID!" Naruto snapped.

Every last Genin on the ship was far more touchy about doing anything "Childish" since coming on this ship. So Kakashi couldn't really blame the boy for his outburst. The Federation was really demeaning all Genin, especially after convincing the Senate to make it illegal to punish them any other way then typical children. At least younger Chunin were still treated with respect... but that didn't help Naruto.

Kakashi sighed, "You can't walk properly in those shoes and you keep tripping on your robes. Frankly, it's embarrassing to be seen with you. Now either take my arm or I'm carrying you to the Captain's quarters."

Naruto scowled.

"There is no shame in admitting you need help."

That got a scoff from the boy, but he relented and wrapped his arms around one of Kakashi's, using it to steady himself. Kakashi had found that, with Naruto, the boy often responded well to parental concern. The boy was denied a proper family, being a demon host. The Hokage spent plenty of time with him but Naruto had been on his own since he was kicked out of the orphanage, purely due to fear and ignorance. As a result, he soaked up affection and parental worry like a dry sponge. Kakashi didn't mind filling that role for him. What was a Sensei if not a parent?

Naruto was walking steadier now. Kakashi was being mindful to walk slowly so Naruto could keep pace. With the support, Naruto was able to actually walk in these shoes... but they still got caught on his robes occasionally and caused him to stumble every now and then. The boy really had no idea how to move in the attire.

Still they made it to the turbo lift without too much trouble. Then took it straight up to the Captain's quarters.

* * *

Naruto didn't know what he expected but the Captain being an old bolding man, as scrawny as a toothpick, seriously wasn't it. Still Naruto had to remind himself that the older the man, the more powerful the Shinobi. You didn't live to old age, as a Shinobi, without being the best.

Naruto couldn't imagine being so old... and he politely told the man that... which got him a slap upside the head from Kakashi.

"Quite," Picard tried to keep his composure. "Now I believe, you are the young man that beat the Kobayashi Maru?" The man seemed just as unimpressed with the boy.

"That's right." Naruto grinned, punching his chest, "First to pass, bitch, believe it!"

Kakashi groaned.

Picard felt his eye twitch, "Indeed." Then raised his hand towards the table deeper in the chambers, "Shall we?"

When Picard turned and began walking away Kakashi grabbed Naruto by his collar as the boy tried to follow. Keeping them in place, Kakashi bent down and whispered to the boy.

"If you don't start behaving like a proper young gentleman, I'll ask the Captain if I can borrow his study so that I may tan your naughty little backside."

Naruto blushed, and hissed back just as quiet, "Sensei-"

"I am serious Naruto. You are representing our entire planet right now and if you cannot behave like a dignified Shinobi I will be forced to treat you like a disobedient child. Understood?"

Naruto blushed, and squirmed a bit as his Sensei was still holding his collar.

"Naruto?" Kakashi low whisper held a warning edge to it.

"Okay, I get it!" Naruto yelled well whispering.

Kakashi nodded and let go of the boy, before nudge him to follow the Captain. Neither of them realized the Captain heard everything they said. Even for his own species, the Captain had exceptional hearing.

Naruto tried walking under his own power for a few steps before his sandal snagged on his robe. Then let out a yelp before falling on his face.

Kakashi sighed and bent down to help the boy. However Naruto squirmed out of reach. The boy sat up and, while still on the floor, took off the sandals well Kakashi groaned at him.

Naruto looked up at his Sensei's disappointed expression and, trying to remember his manners, turned to the Captain. He held up his sandals and asked, "Mind if I take these off? This formal get up is hard to walk in."

Picard was never more convinced that Genin were just children then in that moment. So he decided to treat the boy as such, "You may."

Naruto smiled at him. Naruto turned to his Sensei and wanted to say "See Sensei, he doesn't mind," but the look the man was giving him caused him to keep it too himself. It was quite the look, considered the boy didn't pickup on such things.

* * *

Kakashi... was shocked. Naruto usually ate like a savage but he was eating like a young gentleman despite the start. Maybe the Hokage had taught him a thing or to about manners after all. Unfortunately, soon after the dinner began, the Captain dove into the kid.

"I am curious what your parents think of your chosen apprenticeship," Picard tried to be delicate, but from what he had seen on the Shinobi homeworld. Civilians had mixed feelings about Genin. The man was curious about it, "Especially since, on this particular mission, you are going to be away from home for so long."

Naruto almost forgot himself, but managed to swallow his food before he spoke... still Kakashi wished he wouldn't have been quite so honest, "I don't have parents. A lot of orphans enroll in the Academy as soon as they can. The Village gives them their own apartment and a decent sized stipend. After the Orphanage kicked me out, the Hokage thought that was the best place for me."

Kakashi wanted to groan. Yes it was common knowledge what happened to Naruto, but that was in the village. These aliens wouldn't know nor understand about the boy's early treatment.

"Does that have anything to do with the Energy construct inside you?" The Captain causally asked and Kakashi did his best not to react.

Kakashi's mind raced, just how much did this man know and what was safe to tell him. Of course, Naruto answered without thinking.

"Pretty much. All the civilians hate me cuz they don't understand how sealing works." Naruto shrugged it off as he took another bite of the weird purple thing on his plate.

Picard didn't miss a beat, "What do you mean, they hate you?" However he was thinking along the lines of the other children picked on him.

Naruto was too lost in his head to under the political nightmare they just entered, "They didn't do anything too bad, in comparison to other Jinchuriki, like Gaara. Sure I got beat up a lot, and had to eat out of trashcans for the first few years of my life, but I met a few kind people who took pity on me and helped me... Gaara didn't have that..."

Picard's fist tightened, "Jinchuriki... 'demon host'," his eyes drilled into Kakashi, demanding explanation, " Don't let me your people are so backwards you actually believe such nonsense to the point you lash out against children."

While Kakashi tried to think of a way out of this, Naruto charged in without thinking.

"WHO YOU CALLING BACKWARDS!" Naruto yelled.

Picard sighed, "Perhaps it is best if you left. I need to speak with your-"

"I AIN'T GOING NOWHERE!" Naruto raged, "I'm tired of you Terrains constantly looking down on us. I get we might not be as advanced as you but that doesn't mean we are 'primitive'. You keep preaching about how you have a 'evolved morality' without realizing merely making such a claim proves you don't have it. No creature that actually gave a damn about other people world claim to be 'superior' to them. Your entire civilization is dripping with hypocrisy. You keep saying your tolerant of other cultures. That your highest law IS tolerance, but you keep condemning my people every chance you get. You think your way of thinking is the only right way and you condemn those that think differently from you in any way, all while smiling to their face. And you know what, THAT'S HUMAN! You're not perfect, so stop pretending to be! That kind of thinking is the real danger. The moment you put your lives over that of other people you are already going down the path of tyrants!

"You have been teaching us your history while never asking after our own. Well let me give you a lesson. We discovered combustion engines, guns, even atomic theories and you know what we did with that after we found out what it could do? WE MADE IT ILLEGAL! How do you think we know enough to reverse engineer your technology if we don't at least understand the theories. Sakura told me a lot of your tech we made illegal soon after the concept developed. We never even attempted prototypes of any of the shit you nearly destroyed your planet with. So maybe we're not as stupid as you think!

"Our knowledge of genetics is on par with your own, and while you have better equipment, our medical procedures aren't that far behind. We're even centuries more advanced then you when it comes to genetic engineering. But did you EVER even ATTEMPT to look at any of that! No, you learned we were a Warrior culture and automatically labelled yourselves as better then us. You heard what we did to discover warp and condemned our entire species!

"Well guess what! If you had been in our position, YOU WOULD HAVE DONE MUCH WORSE! Back when you had 'countries' if a ship had been discovered by any one of them, they would have used that to conquer the rest of their world. Your history is even bloodier then ours and you claim we're the savages. We used this moment to create peace for our entire world! A peace we are all working to encourage will last forever. You might be mad we didn't go your traditional route for discovering warp but that is no excuse to condemn my people!"

Picard looked at the child, despite what an airhead he seemed... how innocent... even with how inappropriate his outburst was... this was no mere child... he certainly didn't have the maturity of an adult... but he held an unusual wisdom in his words, not to mention an amazing strategist to beat even unbeatable test... but his true gift... this child... made Picard feel shame regarding his own actions.

It's true he really never bothered to look into their history, nor understand how advanced they were before they stole the secrets of warp. He should have considered they had to be fairly advanced just to be capable of reverse engineering Federation Technology... and he should have considered why a race that could do that didn't have more destructive weapons or at the very least more pollution in their atmosphere... it appears they made those discovers... and deemed them to harmful to themselves or the planet to pursue. They were probably early 1980's level technologically, with better medical knowledge, but refused to implement most of the traditional technology of that time period because they actually bothers to test it the effects of the technology before implementing it... that was more then most races did... certainly more then early Terrains did.

This boy did something far more impressive then beat the Kobayashi Maru... he made Picard feel ashamed shame over his willful ignorance of this planet.

It was true. He heard how Elemental Prime took control of the ship, but truthfully most worlds, at their technological level, would have done the same... no, as Naruto says, they would have done worse. Even killing the scientists is a likely outcome to anthropologist being discovered. It was one of the more dangerous jobs in the Federation.

The Hokage gained control of the ship and used it as momentum to created an entirely new global government, where even the leaders of the smallest villages where listened to.

No... the biggest issue Picard had was that they were a race of proud HUMANOID warriors. The very fact they were humanoid made them harder to relate to then the Klingons. Because that meant they should bend to human believes and reasoning.

Still... Jean Luc couldn't look past that they used child soldiers. That was too big an issue to ignore... yet it was heavily engrained in their culture. To the point such apprentices were actually admired by citizens and grew up to respectable positions... if they grew up...

That is the thing. Picard doesn't know much about their planet because he put all his effort into learning about these child soldiers... and a good portion of these children don't even make it to adulthood. Oh the vast majority do, and grow up to be as respectable Warriors as Klingons, but not even one child dying as a result of this profession is worth it.

While Picard was lost in thought, Kakashi turned his visible eye to the boy, "Are you done?"

Naruto huffed childishly.

"Good," Kakashi looked over at Picard, "Mind directing me to your study?"

Picard didn't know how to respond to that at first. By the look in the boy's eyes it was clear he understood what was coming. Despite the boy being right, he still screamed his head off at a leader during a diplomatic dinner... that shouldn't go unpunished.

Picard pointed down a hall way, "Second door on the left."

Kakashi then looked at the boy, "Wait for me there."

Naruto gulped, and looked like he was about to beg forgiveness but Kakashi insisted, "Now Naruto. Don't cause a bigger scene then you already have."

The boy slumped and scooted out of his care.

"I'll be along in a few minutes. I have things to discuss with the Captain before I can tend to you."

The boy gulped again but did as he was told.

Once he was gone behind the door, Picard looked deeply at the masked man, "Interesting boy."

Kakashi smiled with his single visible eye, as the rest of his face was covered, "He does have a way about him. Can't resist giving speeches. I can't tell you the number of enemies he has converted to allies with a few passionate words. As unorthodox a tactician he is, his greatest strength as always been his natural talent for diplomacy. Unfortunately, I don't know how to teach him to harness that. All I can do is show him when it is and isn't appropriate to lecture someone."

"Maybe I can help with that." Picard eyed the hall a moment before looking back at Kakashi, "But first, I need to know more about these energy constructs. I imagine there is a story behind why your people call them 'demons',"

Kakashi nodded, and immediately went into it, "What might shock you is we do understand the science behind these 'Chakra Constructs'. Our planet is filled with a substance you call "Dilithium" to the point even out bodies have an organ made of it, attached to an extra circulatory system which districts vast amounts of energy throughout out body.

"The 'Chakra Constructs' are merely lifeforms that developed on our planet as a result this energy. The oldest of them are actually powerful Shinobi who learned to survive without the need of a physical body. They later had kids and created various races of these energy beings.

"While we usually live in peace with each other, even going so far as to have a near symbiotic relationship between a chosen few Shinibi, they are not all benevolent. Some of them are rather... cruel, and need to be contained. Unfortunately this resulted in a practice of trapping the more dangerous Constructs inside infants, as an older individual likely couldn't survive the procedure. These children should be praised as Wardens of the beast they contain, but fact is most civilians don't understand the child is a prison and not the construct in mortal form... they are not kind to these young heroes. Which results in many of them going insane. Which causes greater mistrust for future generations... it is to the point that not even attempts at educating the public have any effect. People believe what they want to believe, as Naruto just pointed out."

Picard eyed the man, "What crimes did the... demon, Naruto carries commit?"

"A few cases of genocide and mass murder. It tried to wipe out our village as well. It is known as a 'Tailed Beast', which was once a fierce group of 9 Shinobi. They somehow learned to step beyond a physical shell thousands of years ago and like to test their powers by massacring powerful villages."

Picard sighed, that sounded like someone that needed to be locked up indefinitely, "But the entity is contained?"

"If Naruto gets angry or scared enough the beast can transfer some of his power and bloodlust into the boy, but that is only in the most extreme life and death situations. It has only happened once in the 12 years he's had the beast inside him."

"Then why allow him to work in such a dangerous field?"

"Because it's what the boy wants. He believes that, despite the village's view of himself and the beast, it is his responsibility to protect them. He's lived a hard life, and all that did was make him kind."


	6. Chapter 6

After Naruto suffered the ultimate humiliation, of a Genin recieving a spanking, Kakashi let him leave the dinner to recover... the hug the boy got had been nice but it also had been extremely embarrassing.

Naruto was supposed to go straight to his quarters but he had run into Gaara, who saw his puffy read eyes and hands "discreetly" rubbing his backside.

Gaara then took to asking, "So I guess the dinner with the Captain went about as well as expected?"

Naruto couldn't help but laugh at that, then mentioned how he barely got to eat anything. So Gaara took him to get some food.

Naruto gulped down his synthohol... it tasted terrible but shinobi were supposed to like booze so he pretended to like it... just as he pretended to hate green vegetables, and never paid attention in class. That is what kids did in movies. So Naruto figured if he acted like those kids, he'd have lots of friends like they did. Eventually that just became his personality after mimicking it for so long.

Gaara sat with him in Ten Forward, drinking apple juice like a little kid. Naruto didn't have much experience with interacting with kids his age, and most of his understanding of cultural norms came from movies, but Gaara... Gaara had absolutely no clue how he should behave... and didn't seem to care either. He seemed to think not killing everyone who slightly irritated him was enough of a compromise. Sure he wanted people to like him, but he didn't get how to do that.

"You sure you don't want to go to the red light district?" Naruto practically begged.

Gaara gave him his usual blank stare, "I... don't really see the point of it."

"The point is boobies!" Naruto yelled, getting a few glares from the Starfleet crew members around them.

"Those are just some kind of weird growth on women... I don't really get what is so appealing about that." Gaara sipped at his Apple juice.

"You don't like booze, you don't care about boobies, you even eat green things voluntarily."

Gaara looked down at his Salad. Then at Naruto's own bowl of Ramen... then back to the Salad. The sand demon host didn't see what the difference was between the two meals, besides one being healthier.

"Seriously Gaara, people are going to start thinking your weird!" Implying, despite Gaara's strangeness, his fellow demon host didn't actually find him 'Weird'. At least, not yet.

Gaara's chest got tight again, but he chose to ignore it as a Puberty thing.

Gaara had asked his Sensei what puberty was, after it became apparent the doctors forgot to contact him. They seemed too distracted by the way Shinobi disciplined their Genin to remember how to do their jobs.

Gaara's Sensei had explained the boy should expect things like this to happen more frequently as his body was going through chemical and hormonal alterations to prepare itself for the ability to reproduce.

When Gaara asked why he was feeling that way towards Naruto when he was a boy. The man went into detail about how sometimes signals get crossed and people find themselves attracted to the same sex and therefore not capable of reproducing but still having the urge to try.

Most people were apparently attracted to both genders, which was just part of the natural order based on how lower animals behaved with their partners, but cultural shaming in Shinobi resulted in them being forced to pick one or the other. With it being more culturally acceptable to choose the opposite gender... it was all very confusing, and a lot of information to dump on the boy all at once.

Baki was very adamant that there was nothing wrong with liking the same gender, or different genders, or not actually wanting to reproduce at all. As apparently their was a third sexuality where people don't actually like physical contact, but many of those people still wanted emotional connections with a specific gender... There was also about a dozen other sexualities, but that one sounded the most like Gaara.

All these different sexes was just how some people were. Being a more intelligent species then animals, humanoids tended to overthink things and develop identity issues as a result. It just came with the territory of having a sentient species. This hypothesis was confirmed by the various alien species in the Galaxy appearing to have similar issues.

Although Baki said that, he appeared to be very embarrassed well having such a conversation. Gaara wasn't sure why but the topic definitely made the man very uncomfortable. So despite not really understanding, Gaara refrained from asking any more questions. The boy was trying to be considerate of people's feelings, after all.

Taking another drink from his apple juice, Gaara studied Naruto. The boy was a curiosity, and his first real friend... Despite Gaara's earlier attempts to kill him... the blonde child was... incredible.

Naruto lived a similar life to Gaara's. Hated by the villages, assassination attempts, treated as an unwanted pariah. All out of fear for the Chakra constructs that inhabited their bodies... the demons... Gaara coped by living down to the title of "Monster" but what Naruto did... Naruto forced himself to live above it... he wanted the Villagers' respect and acknowledgment... he wanted them to embrace him where Gaara long since lost hope that was possible.

Gaara thought the boy naive... weak... but then Naruto beat him... defeated even the demon at his full power... Naruto... Naruto... the boy found his purpose in protecting those he loved... even if they didn't love him back... Naruto understood exactly where Gaara was coming from... everything Gaara felt Naruto had experienced... but Naruto still retained that endless determination for a better life... and he found it... by proving himself to be more then a monster Naruto had gained the respect of many of the Shinobi in his village... maybe not the citizens but he now had so many people that cared about him... Gaara wanted that... Naruto proved it was possible for even a demon host to find people to treasure... and now Gaara dared to hope it was possible, even for him...

"You're face is all red again," Naruto blinked as he ate his Ramen.

"It's a puberty thing," Gaara dismissed well Naruto blushed in return.

"I wonder why none of that ever happens to me?" Naruto absentmindedly ask, before almost immediately straightening in his seat, "Cuz, you know I'm definitely going through that to. I'm a man! I'm just too tough for it to effect me like that!... you think Hinata is going through those weird Puberty fevers you get? She gets red and passes out a lot whenever I'm around her. You don't think it's me, do ya!? Maybe something to do with my demon that causes Puberty fevers!"

Gaara just stared at the boy. Not really sure if he was being stupid or if he had a point... still, "If that was the cause it wouldn't effect me."

"I don't know." Naruto grinned widely, "My 9 tailed beast is a bit more badass then your baby 1 tail."

Gaara... blinked... was Naruto... the boy was actually teasing him. Teasing him about his curse... Gaara had never seen anyone so comfortable with him they would actually TEASE him.

Okay, Gaara took a deep breath, he could do this. Just tease the Blonde back a little. Not that hard. Friends banter. He could do this!

"GAH!" Naruto yelped, "Your nose is bleeding!"

Oh... the moment was gone.

Gaara touched above his upper lip and felt the blood.

"Is that part of puberty! It happens too Hinata too!"

Gaara was never, in his whole life, more jealous of anyone then he was in that moment. Why did Naruto have to keep comparing him to this "Hinata" girl?

"Boys," The children looked up to see the bone guy that had disciplined Naruto.

He was an older Genin so the boys were obligated to treat him with respect.

"What do you want?" Naruto glared. Not caring in the slightest about such formalities.

The Bone guy looked at Naruto a moment, then smacked the upside of the boy's blonde head.

Naruto gave a yelp well Gaara continued to stare blankly.

"Respect your elders," Kimimaro ordered, before moving on. "But I couldn't help but hear your conversation. I can answer any questions you may have."

Naruto blushed, "No! We're good!" He insisted.

Kimimaro rolled his eyes and brought over a nearby chair. Which he quickly sat in. "It's probably better if you don't have conversations like this between yourselves, as neither of you know what your talking about."

Naruto rubbed the back of his head, it stung a bit but was otherwise fine. "My Sensei already had 'the talk' with me, months ago in fact! You don't have to! I get it!"

"Yet you think your issues are because of your demons."

Naruto stiffened. No one not even his favor teacher and honorary big brother, Iruka, had EVER talked so openly about his demon. The most he got was people yelling out "Demon Brat" at him. Naruto couldn't help but squirm in his seat, and not just because his butt still hurt. This guy knew about the demon... yet he was treating him like any other Genin... like Kakashi...

"Sorry if I seem forward." Kimimaro leaned back in his seat, "I'm in charge of shepherding all the younger children for the sound village. It's a rather big red flag when kids start sharing their bizarre theories on sex. That only leads to bigger misunderstandings, and the last thing you need is to think your demons can cause illness to your friends."

Naruto squirmed more... the guy was still talking about the demon, but there was nothing malicious or even pitying. Just a statement of fact.

"If... if it's not the Kyubi." Naruto blushed, looking at his food as he tried to talk about his demon with just as much casualness as the older boy. "Then what?"

Kimimaro started explaining what sex really was and how basic attraction can affect the boys... it was more clinical then that book Kakashi gave Naruto to explain things. It also made Naruto realize... Hinata liked him... like liked him... and so did Gaara.

Naruto really didn't know what to do with that realization... so he pretended not to make the connection with Gaara.

"So what do I do?" Naruto dared ask as he squirmed in his seat, "About Hinata?..."

"Well," the bone guy tapped his chin with his finger. Then looked down at the blonde demon host. "First you should take a few days to sort out your feelings for her. Then we can talk about what to do from there, okay?"

Naruto hesitantly nodded.

Kimimaro then turned to Gaara, "As for your problem. You need to understand, Naruto doesn't feel that way about you. He just wants to be your friend. It can be hard to have a friend you have a crush on but it is better just to have that person in your life then not. He is going to date other people and will likely never be interested in you so you need to remind yourself it is more important to be a good friend and think of his happiness."

Gaara looked back at his Salad as he felt the weight of those words.

"Don't be too hard on him." Naruto muttered, shifting uncontrollably.

Kimimaro smiled at the blonde before looking back at the ginger. There was a reason he was saying this in front of Naruto, "I think you are confusing the feelings you have for your first friend." He said to Gaara, "No one has ever showed they cared for you before and it means a lot, but would you risk losing that by acting on romantic feelings they don't reciprocate?"

"No," Gaara continued to look completely emotionless... but Naruto could sense there was a change.

"Naruto does care about you, a lot. Your the first person like him he has met to, but the only thing he can give you is his friendship. That is not anything to squander... so don't go murdering or threatening girls that like him, especially if he likes them back?"

Strangely Naruto laughed, "Come on, Gaara wouldn't do that. I mean Old Gaara would probably butcher everyone that looks at me and force me to be his boy toy, but New Gaara? New Gaara is too awesome for that."

Gaara... said nothing. What he took from this was Naruto had a lot of faith in him... he would try not to have it misplaced.


	7. Author's Note

A/N:

To the one guy making multiple comments, under different names, on my story about how "revolting" homosexuality is. I will kindly tell you, on behalf of all gay or bi people "FUCK YOU"

This wasn't originally a Yaoi fic, cuz you know what, despite being gay I am not so "disguised" by straight people that I can't write an innocent romance subplot for such a couple.

However, now, just to spite you, I am going to pair Rock Lee with Gaara and Geordi with Dara. Something I honestly had no motivation to do until you started sending a gay man your bigoted hate speaks. If the homophobe just kept his mouth shut this wouldn't have happened.

Kindly stop reading my stories and go fuck yourself .

To the rest of you, don't worry, I don't intend to let this guy ruin my fic. Naruto will still be paired with Hinata (and still be the main pairing of the fic). While the story is still going to focus on the plot and culture clash, with romance merely being a subplot.

If you haven't read Chapter 6 yet, have fun. I just posted it not too long ago... which actually prompted this Author's Note.


	8. Chapter 7

● 1 Month after the Chunin Exam

Naruto grinned, all too eager to be going on an S Rank Mission with his Shinobi Tutor.

Jiraiya was a simple man. He liked booze and peeping into the women's bathhouse. Despite the appearance of a lecherous old man, he was quite the renown author... for romance novels...

Regardless of what Naruto thought of all this, the man was nothing less then one of the most Powerful Shinobi on the Planet. An S Rank Shinobi, the highest rank on the power scaling board... Naruto felt kinda lucky the man took an interests in training him... but wished he wasn't such a perv.

"Come on Pervy Sage!" Naruto called in a huff, "She's obviously not here!"

The tall, athletically built, old man just ignored the boy as he continued to talk to the beautiful women in the gentleman's club. He sat on a couch with 2 women draped under each arm and one on his lap.

"Pervy Sage?" One of the scantily clad women grinned, "Are you a bad boy, mister Shinobi?"

"Just ignore the kid." Jiraiya insisted, "His virgin ass is just scared to be around such lovelies."

"Oh?" One of the girls left his arm to approached the boy. Naruto blushed as she got right next to him and gently pet his spiky blonde hair. "Does the little Genin still get nervous around the ladies. Would you like me to make you a real man?"

Naruto blushed, and started to squirm, "T-that's okay! I'm good!" he said, far too loud.

The woman laughed, patting his cheek, "Don't worry child. I'll be gentle." She promised, "I actually like teaching first year Genin a few tricks." She flicked his village headband.

Naruto's nose started bleeding, who would have guessed he was a pervert to. Naruto spent the next hour telling the woman all his secrets. He even confessed to her that he was a demon host and how hard it was growing up with that burden. She seemed very understanding, and didn't shy away from him once.

"Come on brat," Jiraiya suddenly called as he started to leave, but Naruto hesitated to leave the woman's side.

Jiraiya stopped when he reached them, and passed a nice sack of yen to the woman, "Thanks for giving the boy the time of day."

"He deserves it." She slipped the bills into her cleavage, before flicking Naruto's headband again... then gently kissed his cheek.

After leaving the club, Naruto was disappointed to report his virginity was still in tact. The woman hadn't even given him a lap dance.

Jiraiya eyed the unusually quiet boy. "That was a gentlemen's club. The women just get paid to flirt and nothing more. I found they are a good place to gather information. Those girls hear things, and are willing to share for a nice enough tip. Not as effective as the homeless network, but definitely more thrilling."

Naruto suddenly looked down, "So she didn't really care about me?" feeling a little heart broken.

"Of course she cares." Jiraiya insisted, "You don't go in that line of work without a compassionate heart. Most of them are training to be geishas. Think of them as very sexy therapist."

"But if they are willing to trade secrets for money..." Naruto frowned, regretting everything he told the woman.

"Only to people they trust. And then, only if they think the cause is just. They are Companions, Geisha in training, they know better then to tell just anyone what they hear. Which is why, even if the cause is worthy, they expect a donation." Jiraiya was sure to leave out the part that the woman undoubtedly went over to the boy to distract him well the adults talked business. "Come on brat, I learned where Tsunade is staying."

###

● Present Day,

on the Enterprise.

"These Terrains are such prudes!" Tsunade scoffed at her childhood teamates declaration, but simply added, "And there booze is too weak." Scowling at the half empty bottle of Romulan Ale.

Jiraiya smiled at her, "Apparently, Terrain's livers can't metabolize alcohol as efficiently as ours." he explained to the greatest combat doctor their world had to offer.

Tsunade sneered at the comment, as if she didn't already know that. Still, "No excuse for such weak booze. I knew I should have been more sparing with the good stuff I brought onboard." she growled. She just finished the last case of her stash a few days ago and was already getting grumpy without proper Sake.

Some of the crew sneaked her a bottle of some illegal ale, claiming it was the strongest stuff in the galaxy. She wanted to laugh at that. While she had to admit, it had a nice taste and went down smooth... it was no better then the buzz from cheap wine in Elemental Prime.

When their planet was making arrangements to send their Genin teams into space. Sarutobi sent Jiraiya on a mission to retrieve Tsunade, so that she could come onboard this ship and study the Federation's medical techniques and train the Genin in Medical Jutsus. Other medical ninja, from the various villages, where chosen as well, but there was only one to a ship. It was only natural the Flagship of the Federation got the best Medical Nin of Elemental Prime.

###

● Worf's first lesson.

Naruto was in a large, empty, cargo bay. Worf said this floor was filled with dozens of these rooms and they were mainly used for full scale evacuations. The main reason they were here is the room could fit Naruto's thousands of Chakra created clones.

The main Naruto stood next to Worf, all proud of himself as his clones fought each other... but Worf looked less then impressed.

Worf actually scowled, "You're... Shadow clones." Using the name for the temporary constructs, "Fight without strategy or skill. They fight as common brawlers. Not Warriors. You need to direct them to fight as a Unit. With the same cunning you showed against the Kobayashi Maru. This... is shameful."

Naruto lost his smug smile... and looked down in both disappointment and shame.

Worf stiffened, remembering he was dealing with a child... still he didn't know how to fix the sheer effect his words caused. So he decided to move on. "Let us go over battle strategies for such large numbers. If you truly wish to be a worthy tactical officer, it is a necessary skill."

"Hai, Worf-Sensei." The boy looked up, determined again.

Worf was thankful the boy bounced back so quickly.

###

● In the Councilors office.

"That's perfectly natural Data." Counselor Deanna Troi sat with the pale gold Android in her office.

"It doesn't feel natural," Data insisted. "It was a simple experiment to see what would happen if I left my emotions chip on well entering my dream program... I had not expected my dreams to become so... graphic. Especially not for it to involve a colleague, whom I greatly respect and whose friendship I appreciate more then most.

"Not to imply a slight against you, Counselor. It is just, from my observations, many organic lifeforms will categorize one of their friends as 'Best'. That is merely how I have come to think of Geordi.

"He is my best friend. He has always been understanding and patient towards my difficulty with relating to organic lifeforms. He has always treated me like an equal. Where others expect me to prove I am Sapient, Geordi has always accepted me... I feel as though such a dream shames all he has done for me."

Deanna smiled, "Sexual fantasies about friends can often cause such feelings. It is normal. Just as having the dreams themselves are normal. You could always have sex, but without experiencing the pleasure or the emotional connection it is designed for. Now, you can, and your body craves it. Just as a human would. You dreamed about Geordi strictly because you feel so comfortable with him."

"My research into humans revealed that many cultures believe same sex relationships are immoral." Data sighed, "That I should never have had such a dream."

"Data..." Deanna smiled, "That hasn't been true for hundreds of years. While many races go through a period where the creating of offspring is the sole purpose of marriage, and that is where the root of such beliefs comes from, most lifeforms realize how barbaric that is long before they discover Warp. Even Klingons see no shame in same sex coupling, nowadays. Even Ferengi have no issues with Same sex couples."

Though Ferengi had similar laws regarding "Bottoms" as they do their females. Ferengi, that liked to play the submissive role in sex, were classified as "Male Wife" and banned from ever wearing clothes or attempting to do business. For this reason, few Ferengi males were willing to publicly announce such a preference... typically only laying with alien lifeforms, that didn't know better.

Regardless of this, Ferengi who had a "Male Wife" were looked on with envy, as such people were considered rare in Ferengi culture.

The few Ferengi that were particularly bad at business, usually to escape crippling debt, would sign a marriage contract to become the "Male Wife" of a wealthy noble. On the condition that their new husband financially supported them, gave them plenty of material goods, and paid off their debts.

Male wife where so coveted that the money obsessed Ferengi actually agreed to this more often then not.

Data thought on this, "So... my research was wrong?"

"More like incomplete." Deanna explained, "As I said, most races go through a period of religious or political propaganda (sometimes both) shaming or even punishing same sex unions. This nearly always starts as a way to promote breeding, as the more individuals in a religion or government give it more power and respectability. This inevitably results in overpopulation. Which, in turn, leads to acceptance, and even encouragement, of same sex couples to combat it.

"Even the newest additions to the Federation, these Shinobi, are starting to go through that. They are still awkward about intercourse with the same gender, but are becoming more accepting of it. Which is good they have at least reached that stage of cultural development or else they would have a hard time fitting in with the rest of the Galaxy."

"While this is fascinating," Data assured, knowing the Counselor was telling him all this to normalize the situation for him, "What should I do about Geordi?"

"Who says you have to do anything?" Deanna smiled. "It was just a dream Data. It's best to ignore it."

"..." Data eyed her a moment before insisting, "It feels like I should do something."


End file.
